DirtyApu's Hizzy

That’s right little Apusters, another un-advertised blue light special was run today on ass whoopins.  Dunasty said I’ll take two!!  As you can see Deekeye passed on the first but just couldn’t resist the second opportunity.  Apu loves to run Blue light specials, it just makes me feel good to offer ass whoopins at a discount to all my friends. 

I must say today’s special was filled with all kinds of goodies… Rockets, grenades, and even a few shotguns for the luck few who happened to be around when I offered the special.  I even give away a couple of wingtips when they got stuck in some asses.  (Ha Ha I didn’t want them back after where they had been.)

Hurry and get in on some real down home ass whoppins and you too could get lucky enough to happen upon one of my specials.  Now all it takes to sign up is a crisp new $100 dollar bill sent to my paypal account @ [email protected].  You must be a member in order to take advantage of the blue light specials so make your reservations today.  You will immediately receive your first beat down upon payment.  Hurry while the ass whoopins are still cheap!! 

Deekeye and Dunasty Did!!!

Yes that is right… Apu was running an unadvertised special today on Ass Whoopin’s and Dunasty decided to go for the bargain.  Sorry for all you who missed out on the special (Deekeye) but you just never know I am likely to offer one on a given day!  It’s all about being at the right place at the right time.  Thats right little Apusters… it was blue light special time today. A real two for one deal on a special ass whoopin from the Mighty Apu.  Sad but True!

Who will be the next contestant on the Ass Whoopin is right?  Johnny take it away…  Deekeye Stinkeye, Come on down.  Your the next contestant on the Ass Whoopin is right!!!!

DirtyApu

 That’s right little apusters… I’m back and kicking more ass than ever.  Just look at the latest score from a recently played game.  As you can see the Apuster was handing out a bit of “Act Right” to these yahooies that call themselves Quake players.  They are really just Quaking in there boots when the Apuster steps into the squared circle with them.  While they are getting a little better they are still no match for the great Apu!!!

Stay tuned to see Apu lights up some more Asses. 

If you would like to be a contestant on the Apu show and get your ass lit up please send $100 dollar to my paypal account and I will proceed to light up your ass just like I do these noobs. Entire day ass lightings are $1000. Apu is not responsible for feelings of extreme humiliation.

This post comes a bit belated but just to re-cap what happend before the Christmas vacation, Apu was in the giving mood so he proceeded to give a special Christmas time ass whooping to the Dunasty!  I was in such a giving mood I give him a beat down that would last all season.  I am sure his pride is still hurting.  Sammy Clause came a little early this year for the Dunasty one. 

 My only regreat is that Deekeye was AWOL as usual so he could not join in for the Christmas giving session.  Well maybe in 2007 someone will improve their skills and give the Apuster some competition.  (Or maybe not) 

Anyway, I am sure that 2007 will hold all new lows for Deekeye and Dunasty.  They will need a pry bar to get the Apuster off they ass!

Peace my Shizzle!

As you can see by the score DirtyApu was stroking on all cylinders today.  While Deekeye was AWOL again, Apu give The Dunasty a beat down he won’t soon forget.  I am glad to see that at least Dunasty will come out and play.  I have been expecting him to run and hide like Deekeye but so far that hasn’t happened.  As you can see today Dunasty couldn’t even beat one of the bots. How sad!!

Well, I just don’t know what to say.  Maybe some of you out in Apu land would like to take a beat down.  If you are so inclined please feel free to post the server address here and send in you $100 dollar bill. Apu will then proceed to whip your ass like a dominatrix at an S&M Ball.

 Till next time Little Apusters. Peace, Love, the Slap!

 DirtyApu

As you can see DirtyApu has reigned supreme one more day.  DirtyApu’s the name Ass Whipping is my game.  DirtyApu give Deekeye and Dunaster the OG Beat Down this afternoon.  I mean come on guys I need some competition.  I was kicking there ass so hard they were tasting dog shit.  I had an extreme case of kickassism and I had to unleash on these two noobies. 

 So what is DirtyApu to do? Go and find new talent?  Well, that might just be an option.  Just today a noobie walked in the door and proceeded to ask for an ass whooping from the Apuster.  Well, we just might have to load up the old Quake III game on this old boy’s computer and let him taste the shoe polish.  More to come on that.  For now, Feel the pain of Deekeye and Dunaster.  They won’t taste the turkey this Thanksgiving cause the taste of leather will be to strong. 

 Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

 DirtyApu.

Oh yeah, the Apuster has struck again.  Suprise, Suprise, Deekeye actually showed up today.  Well, he was present for roll call, I’m not sure you would say he showed up!  Ha Ha.  By the way in the screen shot the almightydunaster is Garcia whom I have refered to in the past.  He is doing a little better but still no match for the great Apuster.  While wiping up the floor with these cats earlier we had to exit the server very rapidly for unspoken reasons.  I know that Deekeye and Dunaster will have something to say about it but rest assured DirtyApu was kicking off in some ass!!

 Tally Ho faithful readers!  Until next week watch your back or you might catch a rocket up the ass!

DirtyApu

Well just as I suspected Deekeye was no where to be found when I got ready to whoop some ass today.  He talks a lot of garbage saying that the Apuster is not around (when he knew I wouldn’t be).   So after talking all the shit I have tried to give him his opportunity for two days now.  I crank up the old server today and where is Deekeye.  AWOL!  That’s where he is.  Well, if the enemy is always running from you I guess you have won the war.  Trouble is I want to keep the war going.  We’ll see if Deekeye Stinkeye shows back up.  I doubt it.  He is to afraid to face the Apuster.

 I will have to give it to Garcia, he took his ass whippings like a man today.  At least he will give it his best shot even though he is no match for DirtyApu.  He at least took his chances and eat a few rocket’s today.  I have to say he took it like a man.  No turning tail and running.

Anytime your ready Mr. Deekeye, I will be waiting at the Quickie Mart for you!!!  Come on in the water’s fine!

 DirtyApu.

Welcome to DirtyApu’s house of pain. Today we are going to dis Deekeye Stinkeye.  After the ass whooping he received the other day playing Quake III Arena he is as mad as a Keebler Elf Demoted to Fudge Packer!   Yeah, Yeah, I know what your thinking “Quake III Arena is pretty old”  Well I am kind of fond of the simple games in life.  This game is not overly complicated, it’s fun to play, and it loads and runs lightning fast on a newer machine. 

Back to the Stinkeye man.  He is really a Day of Defeat man however, the fast pace of Quake has lured him into many an afternoon spanking.  Garcia is another gamer who sucks pretty hard at Quake.  Just today I was kicking his ass really hard and he just decides to shut down the server.  He is about as scary as  a bot set to EASY!!!  Ha Ha.  These two really need to step up their game to hang with DirtyApu.

 More dissing to come!!