DirtyApu's Hizzy

Lost a great friend tonight.  Deekeye was one of my Quake & Counterstrike buddies.  He died tonight.  Rest in Peace my friend, Rest in Peace.

Greetings from the Smackaho Tribe!

Let me tell you a story boys and girls about Apu’s ancestory… That’s right, Apu is opening up about his past.  I feel a need to let all the the little Apuster’s know that Apu is part Indian.  Apu is from a great tride raised on the mean streets and badlands.  The tribes name reflects on how Apu whips his opponents in the Arena.  The tribe Apu speaks of are few in members but great at Kickassory. 

We are the Smackaho tribe.  Thats right boys and girls, Smackaho.  Apu lived up to one of his tribes great traditions today and Smacked dees ho’s like he owned em.  Just take a look at how bad the smacking was.  Deekeye Stinkeye couldn’t even break into the double digits.  WOW!  People say Apu why are so great, how is it that you whip these boys ass so easily.  Apu just smiles and remembers his ancestors and the great warriors they were and knows it’s just the Kickassory tradition handed down over the generations.  Sorry fellows but the great Apu will always be on top.  Smacking Ho’s and taking names.

So as I carry on the great traditions of my people all you little Apuster’s remember, Come rain, sleet, or shine, Apu will deliver the foot to your behind.  And to all you little Apuster’s out there, Peace, Love and Smackaho’s forever!

V……  DirtyApu! (Smackaho’s Unite!)

Well boy’s and girls now you don’t have to go all the way to Broadway to see a first class exibition, you can just come down to DirtyApu’s House of Pain and watch this long time crowd pleaser…. Stomp!  That is right you can see Stomp for free and it is much better then the broadway version.  You get to see DirtyApu Stomp Deekeye Stinkeye and Dunasty.  Two for One!!!   So come on down little Apuster’s to the fabulous Apu Arena and watch Stomp first hand.

Not only will you get to witness Stomp of Ass but you can see Stomp of heads, Stomp them while their down.  Stomp the Dunasty and best of all Stomp the Deekeye.  Thats right boy’s and girls an Ass Stomping blue light special for all.  No admission fee if you show your Apuster card.  So ya’ll come on down now… Ya hear!

Until next time little Apuster’s…  Peace and Stomp forever!

DirtyApu

That’s right little Apuster’s, Dunasty took a boot up the ass once again.  What’s even better is he advertised it as a blue light special.  Well, boys and girls you know Apu don’t appreciate anyone trying to run a blue light special… especially when Apu has exclusive rights to the blue light special.  Instead of hiring a lawyer I took matters into my own hands and dished out a little special of my own.  It was a Special Ass Whoopin’ Apu style!! 

Dunasty is like oh great Apu what about me what about my wins.  Well, his wins have been so few and far between I am not sure I would even call them wins.  There more like anomalies. So when Dunasty tries to talk about his wins I just have to giggle because all the little Apuster’s know the deal.  Oh by the way I think Dunasty is going to start his blog back up… It will be called “The House of Stain”  because he soils himself everytime Apu is in the Arena!

Until next time boys and girls… Peace and Apuness forever …V.

The Great but not to Late DirtyApu!

 P.S. You may be detecting a trend here… No Deekeye.  Guess he is just to afraid to face the Mighty Apu!

That is right boys and girls… You may have thought DirtyApu deserted you but here I am back and better than ever.  I took a little holiday from the blogging but believe it when I tell you I haven’t given Dunasty or Deekeye any holiday.  I have been kicking their ass on a regular basis and making them cry like little girls.  Just to prove my point I am going to include several ass whoopin’s they have received over the past few month for all you little Apuster’s to enjoy.  Don’t get to excited when you see these boy’s and girls… The best is yet to come! 

Dunasty Loves the camping but on Oct. 7 2007, camping couldn’t save his sorry a$$.

That’s right boys and girls take a look at these scores. These ladies were certainly tasting the shoe polish today!

That’s right little Apuster’s I am back and let me catch you up on the latest happenings in Apuland… First of all Dunasty was shamed and finally realized that he was not going to win no matter how hard he tried and started staying in the game till the end.  Chalk one up for the little Apusters out there.  (Persistant ass whippings pay off!) 

Next the Tri-Quakers have found some exciting new diggs along with an augmented form of play that allows the Apuster’s talents to shine ever so brightly.  That’s right boy’s and girl’s as if you didn’t know already the Apuster is still kicking off in some ass at every turn of the game.  These boy’s thought throwing a gaggle of bots in the mix might improve their chances… WRONG!  The Apuster whipped all those asses.  As  you can see by the score it was quiet the Melee.  Have no fear little Apusters your hero prevailed and kicked more ass than ever before.

I have never seen so many whipped asses.  It was a whip, whip here.  A whip, whip there.  Here a whip there a whip everywhere a whip, whip.  Ol’ Apuster had a Melee Ee i ee i o!!!  I will tell you this boy’s and girls… in the midst of kicking so much ass and shoving rockets down these punks throat the Apuster managed to have a little fun.

That’s all for now little Apusters… Until next time (as always)…… Peace

DirtyApu

That’s right its a sad sad day to find out that Dunasty is deliberatley trying to Hornswaggle all you little Apusters.  In an obvious attempt to prevent the Great Apu from capturing evidence of an obvious beat down, Dunasty has taken to some very nasty habits.  As you can see from the last couple of post the full wrath of Apu has not been played out.  Why is that you may ask… well it happens to be that in a very cowardly fashion Dunasty likes to wait until the Apuster has almost finalized the OG beatdown and then jump out of the game.

That’s right boys and girls there is no level to low to which Dunasty will stoop in an attempt to keep the news of another smack down from reaching all you little Apusters.  But have no fear for your hero is here!  That’s right little Apusters, DirtyApu is always one step ahead of these yahooies I took a screen shot before the game was over so that all of you could relish in the victory that is Apu!

Stay tuned boy’s and girls and Apu will keep you up to date on all the dirty dealings of the opposition and all the triumphs of the Apu nation!

Until next time……. Peace

Apu

That is right all you boy’s and girl’s in Apu land… Like they say in Texas if you mess with the bull you get the Horns.  Apu give these punks the horn and made em like it.  These punks just don’t know when to stop.  Deekeye e-mails me talking a bunch of trash about returning one of my blue light specials well this girlie man obviously doesn’t know Apu don’t have a return policy. That’s right little Apuster’s you take a blue light special from Apu and you might as well get ready to tote it around for a while cause we don’t have no customer service department.

I am happy to run a special for these boys any day of the week but don’t think for a miniute Apu will let them return the favor.  These girlie men said “Apu your beating up on us cause we are killing each other”.  Well here you go boys and girls a little evidence that Apu can not only kick off in some ass against both these pucks at once but he can do it one on one too. 

All you little Apuster’s out there repeat after me… Apu winning, Keeps us grinning!!!

Until next time little Apuster’s…. Peace….V

 DirtyApu

That’s right Apu in the hizzy wit da Mad Squabbles.  I am back and kicking more ass than ever before.  What these punks think they doing in Apu’s hizzy?  Get out my house!!! While these two sissy’s were muff punching each other the Apuster was kicking off in their ass.  Rockets flying, shotgun blasts, Rail gun fire, and the Apuster came through like Rambo… Without a scratch. 

Thats right these boys were taking it like the French… (You know getting their ass kicked without fighting back.)  Ha Ha.  Well little Apusters once again your hero has prevailed.  I ran a blue light special these boys won’t soon forget.  Speaking of blue light specials, you can just refer to the Apuster as a K-mart radio cause I don’t play! 

 All you little Apusters out there stay tuned and watch for the next episode of the ApuFu. Thats kind of like KongFu except Apu is doing ALL the ass kicking.

 Until next time little Apusters… Peace  V…….

 DiryApu

That’s right boy’s and girl’s the word for the day is “Almost”.  Can you say Almost boy’s and girl’s?  Deekeye and Dunasty Almost avoided an ass whoopin today.  They Almost avoided catching a rocket up the ass from the Apuster and they Almost got enough points to win.  The key word for all you little Apusters out there is they “Almost” did all these things.  Almost isn’t good enough to keep Apu from Fraggin that ass!! 

That is right little Apuster’s I happened upon Dunasty trying to let his Blue Light Special shine on thru but Apu stuffed that bargain back on the shelf and decided to run a special of his own.  Deekeye was winning big in the beginning and faded fast.  Then just when Dunasty thought he had it all sewn up… Alacablam!!! The Apuster layed the smack down in Apu Town.  I took them down to Jabronie street and checked them into the smack down hotel.  (Their room there is booked for the whole week!) Ha Ha

All the little Apuster’s repeat after me “Almost Winning keeps Apu Grinning”  Ha Ha. Till next time little Apuster’s Peace V….

DirtyApu