DirtyApu's Hizzy

That’s right boy’s and girl’s the word for the day is “Almost”.  Can you say Almost boy’s and girl’s?  Deekeye and Dunasty Almost avoided an ass whoopin today.  They Almost avoided catching a rocket up the ass from the Apuster and they Almost got enough points to win.  The key word for all you little Apusters out there is they “Almost” did all these things.  Almost isn’t good enough to keep Apu from Fraggin that ass!! 

That is right little Apuster’s I happened upon Dunasty trying to let his Blue Light Special shine on thru but Apu stuffed that bargain back on the shelf and decided to run a special of his own.  Deekeye was winning big in the beginning and faded fast.  Then just when Dunasty thought he had it all sewn up… Alacablam!!! The Apuster layed the smack down in Apu Town.  I took them down to Jabronie street and checked them into the smack down hotel.  (Their room there is booked for the whole week!) Ha Ha

All the little Apuster’s repeat after me “Almost Winning keeps Apu Grinning”  Ha Ha. Till next time little Apuster’s Peace V….

DirtyApu

That’s right little Apusters, another un-advertised blue light special was run today on ass whoopins.  Dunasty said I’ll take two!!  As you can see Deekeye passed on the first but just couldn’t resist the second opportunity.  Apu loves to run Blue light specials, it just makes me feel good to offer ass whoopins at a discount to all my friends. 

I must say today’s special was filled with all kinds of goodies… Rockets, grenades, and even a few shotguns for the luck few who happened to be around when I offered the special.  I even give away a couple of wingtips when they got stuck in some asses.  (Ha Ha I didn’t want them back after where they had been.)

Hurry and get in on some real down home ass whoppins and you too could get lucky enough to happen upon one of my specials.  Now all it takes to sign up is a crisp new $100 dollar bill sent to my paypal account @ [email protected].  You must be a member in order to take advantage of the blue light specials so make your reservations today.  You will immediately receive your first beat down upon payment.  Hurry while the ass whoopins are still cheap!! 

Deekeye and Dunasty Did!!!

Yes that is right… Apu was running an unadvertised special today on Ass Whoopin’s and Dunasty decided to go for the bargain.  Sorry for all you who missed out on the special (Deekeye) but you just never know I am likely to offer one on a given day!  It’s all about being at the right place at the right time.  Thats right little Apusters… it was blue light special time today. A real two for one deal on a special ass whoopin from the Mighty Apu.  Sad but True!

Who will be the next contestant on the Ass Whoopin is right?  Johnny take it away…  Deekeye Stinkeye, Come on down.  Your the next contestant on the Ass Whoopin is right!!!!

DirtyApu

 That’s right little apusters… I’m back and kicking more ass than ever.  Just look at the latest score from a recently played game.  As you can see the Apuster was handing out a bit of “Act Right” to these yahooies that call themselves Quake players.  They are really just Quaking in there boots when the Apuster steps into the squared circle with them.  While they are getting a little better they are still no match for the great Apu!!!

Stay tuned to see Apu lights up some more Asses. 

If you would like to be a contestant on the Apu show and get your ass lit up please send $100 dollar to my paypal account and I will proceed to light up your ass just like I do these noobs. Entire day ass lightings are $1000. Apu is not responsible for feelings of extreme humiliation.